Fifty Incident

The price of gas is, in as few of words as possible, gay. Stations around my area aren't applicable for the rise. One thing I've found difficult, is trying to pay for gas with a fifty dollar bill. It's circulated currency still, right, or have I neglected to receive the memo stating fifty dollar bills are nonexchangeable?

Every time I pull out a "Grant", if you will, the gas station attendant squares me up, glaring at me, sometimes sighing after he/she spots the bill.

I have gone as far as to give the attendant a one-hundred dollar bill to feed his/her cash register, and I was turned down. "We don't accept anything larger than a fifty...," where, upon my ears registering what he (because at this time, it was a male) said, I replied, "...And then even then, you guys throw a fit because I've given you a fifty for thirty dollars worth of gas!" He then eyed me and said flat out, "I can't accept this bill, sir..."

In fact, he didn't accept it. What ended our spat was me saying, "This is the only bill I have in my wallet, besides a ten, so you don't really have a choice - you accept the hundred, or I get a free tank of gas..." He then, very stubbornly, swiped his Dillion's Plus card through the card reader on his computer, not once, but THREE times, typed in a top secret code, and said, "Give me the ten." If you are wondering if that man is still working at that Kwik Shop, I'm sorry to say they let him go.

It's not like the Kwik Shop doesn't have change for a hundred. In fact, I was told by an attendant-friend of mine, Kwik Shops have safes full of a couple hundred, to a thousand dollars!

Now here's where the fifty-dollar bill plays into the matter. I had just picked up my paycheck, and saw that I was depleted in the gas-situation of my car. I "filled-her-up," like they say in the moving pictures, and went in to pay for the gas. My total was twenty even. I go up to the counter to pay, the lady, the time, said, "Twenty even," and I open my wallet, and finger through four hundreds, a fifty, and a couple twenties. I go for the fifty, pull out the fifty, lay the fifty on the counter. She asks, "Sir, do you have anything smaller," while she eyes the contents of my bill-fold. "I have a twenty, but I'd rather break the fifty." "We don't accept fifties," she says, looking over my head to bare witness to the line forming behind me. "But you have change for a fifty, right?" "Yes sir, but we don't accept them."

I peer over the counter, at the contents of her register. "I count, literally, four-to-five twenties in you till, a bunch of tens, and a couple ones. Can't you break this fifty?" "We hate breaking anything larger than a twenty." "So if I gave you forty dollars, with thirty in my tank, you wouldn't break forty dollars?" "No, we would, but as far as bills, we don't accept anything over fifty." "But you have big, diesel-gusseling vehicles, and gas-gusseling trucks coming in and out of here daily. You wouldn't break a fifty if they had one, if they had more than twenty, or even forty dollars worth of gas?" "Sir, I'm not going to accept your fifty." I ended up backing down for the sake of the line behind me.

My dad had the same problem at the station closest to our house. "I had thirty-some dollars worth of gas, and she wanted two twenties. I had a fifty, or a twenty. She finally took the fifty, but I knew the only reason why she did was she was forced to."

The ultimatum: you accept my fifty dollar bill, or I get a free tank of gas - my dad has used it, and I've used it. What's the difference between the two bills, the twenty and the fifty? Just thirty single bills, six fives, three tens, a twenty and a ten...etc. Gas prices have yet to peak. Start accepting the fifties, or have a bunch of irate people. Seriously, what's easier for you? You would think one bill - the fifty - but for some reason, they'd rather deal with two twenties. It dumbfounds the shit out of me! How ignorant is this debate - accept fifties, or I get a free tank of gas?

The Rant I've Been Wanting to Write

What's our stance today? How can we still be a Democracy when our president ignores the wishes of the people, and parades around like a tyrant, insisting he is correct, everyone else is ignorant, and the world is safer if he deploys thousands more of his sovereignty to a country that has no hope of reconstruction? Look at it like this: we were liberated once. We sought freedom, fought for it, lost lives in the fight to obtain it; we were once Iraq. And once we gained our independence from Great Britain, one side said, "I want to keep my slaves," another side said, "We're better than that. We can do our own field work."
We've seen opposing forces, living in the same country, loving the same national symbol, fight for differing opinions. We were once North and South. It's almost a given that once a country gains its own control, placed in front of the steering wheel for a change, if you will, and told to lead, there will be birthed opposition against a leading force, thinking they are right, the others are wrong, and sporting a much larger head than normal. We went through a civil war.
The French, in return for helping us win our war for freedom, did not ask, or simply request to stay in our country, help us run our state, and ultimately take the place of the tyrannical government that we fought so damn hard to rid ourselves of. They sailed back to their country, and, of course, we said thanks.
Why is it that the United States always wants something in return; we can't just help out a person in need, and be on our way.
Bush says, “I fully understand they could try to stop me from doing it. But I have made my decision. And we’re going forward." He wants more troops in Iraq to fight terrorism. I guess I misunderstand the terms the news, the president, the vice-president, and about everyone I know use when explaining Iraq. Which war do they refer to? The one our president says we're in against terrorism, or the one he says we're in against Iraq? Or maybe, is it the war we continue to fight at home?
Terrorist cells will remain in Iraq. When the British were overtaxing us, killing our people for no reason, and restricting what we could and could not do in our own country, the militia, I guess, was a terrorist cell against them. Now, we remain in a country we don't belong in, we've helped out all we really can, and now we are an annoyance. And the terrorists who lay down IE D's for our troops to get killed by, are basically protecting their way of life, like our militia protected America.
The troops are given orders, and those people either perform what they are told to do, or go to prison, or are tried, and sentenced with a dishonorable discharge. Nobody really wants to fight in a war. Those who say they do are trying to be noble, and there's nothing wrong in wanting to be a hero. I'm mainly just stating a fact here - our government hasn't hid this intention from us, either. We are expendable to them. What's a few lives if we can expand our so-called Democracy over the face of the globe?
It's our way or the highway - if congress wants to get in the way of "freedom", then shove them out of the way. Freedom can be many things. It can be freedom as in, Bush is free to do what he wants because he's the commander-in-chief. Freedom can be, the people have the freedom to overrule their elected official, but can't practice that freedom because they would be labelled a "terrorist" or a "national security threat," and ultimately, they destroy themselves in the process of saying what's on the minds of many Americans these days. So in an essence, Democracy isn't a government for the people, by the people; that illusion has been unearthed, and essentially dead. Real Democracy lies within one person - if that person chooses to abuse his or her authority, too bad. Are we still so blind that we can't spot the proof that one person has been given too much power?

My Only Comment...

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Terror Bird!

I was about to do an anti-America rant, but it got cheesy, and I've just decided that part of me is too politically influenced, mainly by the corrupt speech that exits the mouths of most if not every politician out lobbying today. Instead, I'll sum up lobbyists by saying they are nothing more than finches in a dying bush, senselessly chirping away.

This bridges over into the reason why I wish I had a hawk.

I want a big, mother fucking falcon perched upon my gloved hand, dressed in the falconer's hood or whatever that little mask is called that hawks and other gaming birds wear, so they don't get wise and fly off, resorting to their wildlife tendencies.

I hate pigeons - rats with wings. If I had a hawk or said falcon above, I would never have to worry about seeing a pigeon again in my life, unless it was a pigeon carcass. Now, I realize pigeons have diseases, and if my bird-fiend were to snack all day on pigeon entrails and nothing else, I probably wouldn't have a hawk for very long. I also hate finches, and other annoying, miniature, novelty birds, unless they are parakeets or cockatoos. So my hawk should have plenty to eat.

I've hated little birds ever since I was little, and here is why.

INFLUENZA, commonly known as the Flu, is a nasty little son of a bitch, who manages to get into your system, and reek all havoc, sometimes causing you to hallucinate uncontrollably, as well as uncontrollably vomit, poop, cough, ache, sneeze, blow your nose, etc. to all icky things. I happened to hallucinate for six hours straight once with Influenza. Part of that time, I thought a flock of finches and mini-birds were outside my window enduring malfeasance, bleak-cheep-chirping away at the expense of the misery I sustained, while I tried to block out their annoyance with the assistance of many layers of blankets and pillows wrapped around my head. But the noises never stopped. I seek revenge.

My solution: acquire a hawk, falcon, or any kind of hawk-like bird. If my hawk's diet results in being all pigeon and no finch, and my hawk dies of disease, it will be an answer to my explication of what to do with the hawk once it has no purpose because it seems too cruel to lock such majestic birds up in cages like they do in zoos, and I don't want to be responsible for causing a bird-plague among other hawks and birds of prey if I were to release suggested sick bird. I would also hate for other hawks, once encountering my pansied-beast of flight, to peck at, or destroy him/her simply because they are not wild anymore. A dead bird is better than a dead bird, which is better than dead birds, I always say. If that bitch is destined to die, let it be as tragic as to die at the hands of disease.