I hate the elderly and babies. My grandma is elderly...don't worry, I don't hate her. But old people are fucking helpless sometimes. Especially the elderly in front of computers. You pretty much have to lead them by the hand when they are on a computer. And they always use the same excuse. "I'm so used to a typewriter. That's how we typed anything, is with a typewriter." I used a typewriter before I used a computer. Before my parents got our Gateway with Windows ME loaded on it which was bullshit; I hated that fucking operating system! Before the parentals bought their Gateway machine, we had a Hewlett Packard because that's what it was known as before HP - we had a Hewlett Packard piece of shit with Windows 3.1. It would freeze up loading Minesweeper. And before that, we had an electric typewriter that was my mom's when she was in college in 1978.
I remember writing short stories and then typing them on that old typewriter. The type bars would always get stuck on the platen, and the ink ribbon, if this ever occurred, would smear and make a god-awful mess on the paper...it was ALL bullshit! That machine was frustrating, not a computer. To be honest with you, because I've worked with both, I prefer the computer over the typewriter, hands down! It's more convenient, and if you think about it, because I write all the time, and rarely print off, I've saved money with a computer compared to a typewriter. Try finding an ink ribbon for a typewriter NOW! Jesus Christ! Paper is so much cheaper than a new ink ribbon, or repairs to a sticking type bar(s). I just can't comprehend how it's so difficult for the elderly to get behind computers.
I guess there is too much of a generation gap, which again, is bullshit. The term generation gap was made up by the elderly as an excuse to be lazy and not learn technology. You've gotta keep up with the times, no matter how stubborn you are or how thick-headed your disposition is.
Here are your two tools when controlling a computer; your mouse and a keyboard -- which should be familiar to all those in allegiance to the typewriter. It's the same damn standard keyboard as before. I don't get it. How simple does it have to be for an elderly person to just get it? Windows Vista has a program for people who hate using their fingers or hands to manipulate the computer -- or for elderly people whose brains are covered in cobwebs -- where you speak a command and the computer complies. That is ridiculous! And you're cheating if you subscribe to it. What!? -- you have a hand wrapped around your cock when you're on a computer, and the other is holding a Kleenex -- you don't want to have to dismount to switch to another porn file, you'd rather speak to your computer and say, "Open Gushing Twats Gangbang!" And bam! A nice, quivering vagina leaking clemen in to a pool, and a loud, orgasmic scream of pleasure...fantastic!
I already know that if I live to be an elderly-person, I'm gonna be tech-savvy.
Babies. I don't get it. You might as well get a cat, preferably one that's sick and vomits too much, and howls for no reason, oh, and wears a diaper which is always filled with a huge load. Don't get me wrong, babies can be fun. You teach them everything you were taught -- there's a whole tradition-thing goin' on with babies and toddlers and adolescence and tweenies and teenagers -- with toddlers, when they first begin to talk, you can teach them bad things to say; I don't condone you do this because once they learn something, they say it, even when you don't want them to say it, and it spoils their minds, and usually these kids are assholes and you find yourself wanting to stab them. Babies are funny. They make noises like R2-D2, they like games -- it's like a little person high; they're always doing something silly and outrageous. I LOVE those babies. I hate babies who are tired, but their parents don't seem to get that they are tired, and drag them around all afternoon without a nap. I hate babies who cry for no reason. Oh, my juice spilled -- oh, I hit myself with a toy I shouldn't have been flinging around -- oh, my bath-water is scolding hot and I now have a third-degree burn -- waa, I'm being abducted! Those babies suck! I like babies who like to rub it in my face that they can get away with sucking on boob all day -- it pisses me off, but I'm relieved that the baby wasn't born gay. I don't think I've ever seen a gay baby. Damn gay-community and their myths...
So, with babies, the good outweighs the bad. With the elderly -- they are just a nuisance, all of them, except my Nana. She's too sweet to be rotten. And now I'm done rambling. Look forward to another post by me here in a month or so about nothing.
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