The Trickledown Effect

I suppose that title is appropriate. I will be talking about urine again, as well as airport security.

I've been to a few airports myself. It has never been a big deal when approaching a security terminal for a "pat-down" -- isn't it a great day for a frisking, it's always a great day for a full-body scan! Some people invoke the awkward stares or the much dreaded temporary set back, such as being detained for wearing baggy black jean shorts that ride down to your ankles, with chains embedded in the fabric; also adding to the goth-trend, metal rings which line the hemmed lining of the pants. Dress down for the airport. Skin tight is preferred (I'm not serious)
Obviously don't wear something that's going to standout. Only a moron would be that absentminded to dress with metal sewn in to their clothes before undertaking a metal-detector walk-through.

These people at the terminals are trained members of a disorganized hierarchy. Why you were patted down? Something set them off. Get your fucking basket, start loading it with the required items that need scanning -- electronic devices, carry-ons, your shoes -- there's three right there. Do not loiter. Standing around like a baffoon, unless you're on the other side of that security station, stand around, walking around; you've been scanned, you are now labeled safe. Just keep moving down the line until you are finished. Ask questions if you must, but don't go in telling every official you see working in the airport that you:

a.) have a request
b.) have a problem with the rules provided
c.) complain that if you are touched in a certain spot on your body a bag of urine will burst (or that the seal on your urostomy bag can be dislodged easily while you endure a pat-down in progress)

Go in with everything you will need to present to the airport officials. Let's say my name is Tom Sawyer of Romulus, Michigan. I've got a urostomy bag strapped to the side of my hip that I know is going to be a problem. I mean let's narrow it down to it's general form, but not it's most general form, a plastic bag of waste, more so a bag of liquid. It's my understanding liquids and powders are prohibited. Best case scenario, I should have a medicinal postulation from my physician, proof that my word that I've had bladder cancer is not false, that I should further bring this to light of airport security before entering the terminal. I can remember my grandma being worried that she wouldn't be able to walk from her plane at one end of the airport, to her boarding terminal clear across the way, so what does she do, she asks for assistance. Liaisons amongst the sea of passengers are there to be guidance to the many novice travelers milling about the airport. Let them approach security officials to take the proper action.

Now to bring you all up to speed on what this post is about. A man from Michigan who had undergone radiation and survived the bladder cancer that afflicted him happened to be traveling this past weekend. His bladder, depleted by the deadly cancer and more than likely a surgery or two he had undergone, if that was his path in fighting his cancer, that route or radiation, and so nowadays he's got a bag he carries on his belt that holds his urine, acting as a replacement bladder. Now that the TSA standards in airport security have been heightened due to the terrorism scare with those transported packages let's say two months ago on the east coast, it's a bitch, sort of speak, to fly these days. Tom Sawyer, if I didn't already state his name above, I did, I remember using it in my little scenario...entered the security lanes in order to gain clearance to board his airplane. He walked up, stated he had a urostomy bag on his belt that the official should watch for, as they began patting him down for weapons, contraband, bags of urine...When the patting became rougher due to the airline official probably feeling as well as now fully aware something was bulging from the side of this individual's pants, Mr. Sawyer made it aware that if they continued knocking the bag on his hip around, the seal would break and he'd be covered in urine. He was whisked away to a detachment room, now soaked in his own urine because they did in fact break the seal.

I want it to be clear that the reason security officials at the airport come off as pricks is because they are a minority. They are trained by someone higher up than them on the regulations, they in turn enforce the regulations, it's really just a matter of better training protocols for such an event as another Mr. Sawyer coming in with another similar medical disability. The sooner these reporters at these media conglomerates realize that the better. Although, is that really the best solution?

Here's a thought: instead of tacking on more clauses and paragraphs to already confusing, shitty regulations, let's be practical. The safety of the passengers, the comfort felt by our passengers and air travelers alike should be the concern, not whether we are ignoring or allowing the next would-be terrorist to act on his or her motives. Do you have any medical conditions we should know about before you proceed to security? There's a starter question because we already have in-place signs that point out what you'll need ready while waiting. We're not fucking cattle! Treat us with respect and stop assuming. The only exercise some people get is jumping to conclusions, running down their friends, side-stepping responsibility, and pushing their luck! On the side of the officials, people need to exert common sense. As far as the side saying the TSA is at fault, take into consideration that these are people with jobs. The paranoia and anxiety of past events are going to take precedence in matters of security and what to look for. Body language says a lot. Get informed, ask for assistance, get on the side of those officials. It's a smoother transaction that way...