Claude Giroux is making a case that he is the best player in the world, but is he the most deserving for the Conn Smythe Trophy? -- asks ESPN's website.
Answer: Nope. Because he's a smug, ponce, stringy-haired fuck! It's one thing to exceed expectations, it's another to abandon such aspirations, and not meet a pre-season expectation of being the number one team in the NHL. Must be nice knowing how mediocre your regular season was, only to reserve some firepower in the post-season, and then think that entitles you somehow in being named best hockey player in the world. Just means you weren't willing to lay down a fight against your arch-rivals the Pittsburgh Penguins, who just so happened to be experiencing a late-game foreseeable meltdown of pretty-boy Sidney Crosby. Also, now incorporating him into the line-up after another stint with that pesky concussion he sustained last season, Malkin and Staal were back to being wingmen, or in my book, useless assholes on skates chasing a puck, and imagining more-so-than excelling in shooting said-puck at Philly's goalkeeper. Too preoccupied in fights and hits from Giroux's teammates, which benched Neal and Asham, and handed Bitz, Weber, and Shaw suspensions. Sounds an awful lot like peewee-hockey to me.
Naming Claude Giroux the best player in the world is like saying Ilya Kovalchuk is the best player in the world -- for the sake of naming a player on teams nobody expected would do jack shit in the playoffs. Who had the Devils over the surging Panthers? -- and why that series ended the way it did. If you've kept up with the post-season in the NHL, the Devils tell Florida to back off with a shutout, the next game, the Panthers answer with one of their own. The Devils force Game 7, and it's exhaustion that proves fatal for the Panthers in 2OTs where New Jersey finally buries them for good.
The Penguins were favorites to win the whole fucking cup this year and it didn't happen. You can't come back from 3 down. Eventually a team will show us you can, but not against the ego of the Flyers, and not for a team like the Penguins who had luck in the end of the regular season.
Isn't that just like the way the league is now!? St. Louis is still in, and they were the number one team at the beginning and middle of the season; Vancouver was the same way last year. In that regard, I see them defying expectations or hushing all those LA fans whispering, "It's our year." Kobe Bryant is saying it, only he's referring to the Lakers. You know, every year his team proves they rely too heavily on him, so what's Kobe do? He backs off by taking some time off with an injury, or, like this year, he tells Brown he's leaving the arena to take a dump at his "home-base" and Brown gives him a smile and a high-five, and the Lakers blow the game. The next night, Bryant has an appointment with a doctor in his hotel room for a penal/urethra scrape and a Penicillin shot right in the dorsal artery of his penis, and an uncomfortable conversation which ends in him telling his doctor this didn't happen. Mike Brown is told in a text, "not playing tonight, I've got the sniffles." Lakers rally, and come to the conclusion we can win without him if we'd only play. Both leagues tamper with the law of averages to defy expectations. Chicago and Phoenix play similarly, let's match them up in the first round. The Sharks and Blues almost have matching jerseys, let's see them duke it out, then act surprised when a team without a GM unexpectedly wins, and another team who relies way too much upon an AHL goalie is taken to the woodshed by a team that's been excellent all year.
And who's left -- L.A., Phoenix, Nashville, St. Louis, New York, New Jersey, Washington, and Philadelphia. For all the fucking "Original Six" gear shoved down our throats all year, there's only New York left. Does Canada still play or even care about hockey?
Every playoff game broadcast because it's the Cup, the NHL -- expect the unexpected -- no wait, the NBA clutched on to that already (SEE Memphis scrap and beat the tar out of San Antonio last year in the first round of the NBA Playoffs) and the NFL draft this year also, I believe. Damn'it, dammit, damn it! What could the NHL use as a slogan? The NHL -- you'll watch them for the two weeks before the NBA playoffs start, then go back to ignoring them until someone is hoisting the Stanley Cup. That's better.
This happened a while back, but I once got stuck in an elevator. I was walking through the employee entrance at work, and the alarm was humming and sort of buzzing, making a weird noise, and I sort of recognized it as a similar sound I heard when our backdoor dead-bolt alarm was malfunctioning, and we had a crew come in to replace it. I thought nothing of it, making my way to the elevator to go upstairs. I shouldn't be lazy, and just walk up the stairs to the second floor where I was needing to go, but instead, I pressed a button and had a lift do the work for me. The door slid closed and a funny thing happened. The overhead lights in the adult circulation department started one-by-one fading to black, and once the doors were fully closed, the power went out and I was stuck in the elevator.
What to do? I fumbled in my pocket, but alas, I had left my phone in my car.
I thought maybe I should start yelling, but if this was a momentary time, I didn't want to be the employee who freaked out in the elevator when the power went out for two minutes that one time. I felt panicky, but I considered where I was, and when that feeling was replaced by just how small my surroundings were, I decided to make the space above me seem more vast by sitting cross legged on the floor of the elevator. There, now I wasn't feeling so trapped. It was 10 minutes and I felt the elevator abruptly start descending towards the basement, and I knew not only was I free, but someone in the basement had called for the elevator, right before probably the electricity went out in the building. Didn't expect that to happen when I was walking through the building to get to my department, definitely thought it came from left-field the moment I pressed for the elevator doors to close, and that stinkin' power went out.
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